Why Finding Your Authentic Self Can Transform Your Life
I was having a conversation with a friend of mine the other day. She was telling me about the time she quit her job and how she felt like herself at 25 again (to give you some context, she is in her late 40s). She had worked in corporate America for about 20 years, hated it, and had finally decided to go out on her own and start a company with a business model that didn’t make sense to a lot of people but was exactly what she wanted to do.
Image credit : Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer
One night, she met up with a coworker from her previous job who asked her how stressed she was running this new business. She explained that she felt far more stressed working in a place she hated, constantly wearing a mask to fit in with the culture, the people, and a job she didn’t like. On her last day at her previous job, she felt like a weight had been lifted and a rush of relief came over her. Over the next couple of months, she began experiencing life like she was 25 again. Running her own business, though it came with its own stress, couldn’t compare because she was finally in charge of what she wanted to do, how she wanted to act, and who she wanted to be around.
Now, we don’t all have the same privileges as my friend, and we can’t all go out and quit our jobs (at least not yet), but we can adjust parts of our reality.
The Layers of Societal Assimilation
We often go through life not realizing how many layers of societal assimilation we put on our true selves to exist without judgment. Only in rare moments do we realize these layers exist, and that we have covered up who we truly are.
Questions to Reconnect with Yourself
A good practice to begin reconnecting with your authentic self is asking yourself questions. This helps you step away from autopilot living:
What moments in your life caused you to change from who you were at your happiest and freest?
Who are the people in your life that trigger you or make you feel like you have to act differently to coexist with them?
What benefits are these people or situations bringing into your life?
Taking Action: Adjusting Your Reality
Once you identify areas or people that bring no value or positivity into your life, it’s time to start formulating a plan to extricate yourself. This doesn’t mean making drastic changes overnight but taking intentional steps toward a life that aligns with your values and happiness. Here are some actionable steps:
Set Boundaries: Learn to say no to people or situations that drain your energy.
Revisit Passions: What hobbies or interests did you love but stopped pursuing? Start small and reintroduce them into your life.
Seek Support: Talk to a trusted friend, mentor, or coach to help guide your path.
A Gentle Reminder for You
You don’t want to look in the mirror one day and not recognize yourself. And I don’t want that for you, babe. Life is too short to live in disconnection from who you truly are.
If you’re struggling to develop a greater understanding of yourself, identify patterns or areas for improvement, and make conscious choices aligned with your values and goals, know that this journey is worth it. It’s never too late to begin realigning with your authentic self.
This Free Work Sheet can help.
